When I was young and everyone was choosing their career the only thing I wanted to do was be a wife and Mom. Being a stay home Mom gave such fulfillment I knew I was doing what God wanted. Now that the boys were older I had to back off and give them to God. They still had a lot to learn but I wasn’t sure they wanted to learn from me anymore, so who better to teach them than the Lord, who loved them even more than I?
About two weeks after I prayed giving God full control of our boys our youngest came to us and told us he was moving to West TX, about seven hours away. We had two days and a night to get used to the idea and frankly I was scared. A quiet voice inside me spoke, telling me I needed to let Steven make his own choices and give him room to grow up. So we didn’t hold him back. We didn’t say the words, “You can’t go”, which is what we wanted to do.
The next few weeks I cried almost constantly when alone. I prayed, I feared, I demanded that God send him home, I worried, I thought about everything that might possibly go wrong and became anxious. That is when God’s voice came through my thoughts reminding me of my prayer, “You gave him to me, just how much do you trust me?”
“Be anxious for nothing, but in all things through prayer and petition with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God.” Phil. 4:6 a Bible verse from Sunday school came back to me.
I fell to my knees; asking forgiveness for my lack of faith, and my attitude. Quietly the words came, “Just trust.” This became my lifeline. Every time I would wake in wee hours with fear trying to take hold of my heart, those calming words came to me. I would pray for Steven, other family members and anyone else God brought to mind, eventually falling into a restful sleep.
Yes, God did send Steven a miracle, several in fact. Over the past six years God has given Steven a family of his own, a good job, and the confidence to succeed in this life. And we finally have a daughter, who has given us four sweet, beautiful grandchildren.
Just Trust, is my motto.